I’m asking because I know there are times when I feel like I’d rather just go and hide than show up and do the things that I need to do. For me this feeling has been really present recently. I’ve had to make a few phone calls lately that I just feel uncomfortable about making. It’s like there is a visceral reaction inside my body just thinking about it and the thought of picking up the phone and making the call makes me feel really sick. It’s not that I have to tell someone something bad either. It’s more that I have to ask that person for something, and I’m not really good at that.
I’ve spent my life pretty much doing things on my own. I pride myself on not having to ask people for favours or support most of the time. Of course there are exceptions, but more often than not, I’d rather not reach out if I don’t have to. So when I do reach out, it means that I’ve been thinking about it for a long time and have exhausted all other avenues to solve my problem independently. Perhaps you can relate.
In today’s world, when it’s so easy to connect with people from the far reaches of the globe, it’s hard to believe I can still be paralysed with fear, facing my own inadequacy, and generally frozen into a state of no action when it comes to reaching out. Especially considering that when I do reach out, more often than not, I am met with extreme kindness and generosity. People naturally want to help each other and do good. (I’m pretty sure it’s built into our DNA – but I’m not a scientist so don’t quote me on that!)
So, if you find yourself in one of these places where showing up is a challenge, just know that you are not alone. Maybe you feel that no one understands what you’re going through, or you’re ashamed of falling into a place of difficulty or despair. Maybe your mind is in a pattern of repeating negative self-talk. My advice to you is that action will always bring about change! A famous quote by Joan Baez is “Action is the antidote to despair.” So what is one action you can take to go beyond the block and show up?
In my case, it was as simple as picking up the phone and making the call. But there are other ways to take action that can help shift the mind. Physical action, such as going for a walk, jog, swim, or bike ride can be helpful to bring about positive energy. Speaking to a friend can also help you reframe the situation. As they say, a problem shared is a problem halved.
Please remember, you are more courageous than you realise. Look how far you’ve come already. Don’t be afraid to take the next step, and if you are afraid, that’s ok too. Embrace the discomfort you are facing, take action and show up. The universe is supporting you no matter what the difficulty is and, by reaching out, you will connect with people who are kind and generous and want to help. Your bravery will be rewarded!